Lifelines… Who Wants to be a Millionaire.
When I was early in my career, still wide-eyed and full of misplaced assumptions, I believed that great leaders were the ones with all the answers. That’s what I thought their job was: solve problems, make decisions, provide certainty.
Boy, was I wrong.
I found myself in a tough spot, one of those work problems that makes your stomach twist. I didn’t know what to do, and I was stuck. So, naturally, I went to my boss’s boss. He had an open-door policy, after all. That’s what leaders are for, right? I walked into his office, laid out the problem, and waited. What I expected was a direct answer, a solution. What I got was a question:
“How would you like to proceed?”
I blinked. “I don’t know,” I replied. “That’s why I’m here.”
He chuckled, not mockingly, but with a kind of knowing smile, and asked, “Do you have any ideas or recommendations?”
Again, I said no. And again, he smiled.
“Why don’t you take some time to reflect on possible paths forward? Bring me two or three options, and we’ll discuss them together.”
At first, I was frustrated. Why won’t he just help me? I thought.
But I did what he asked. I talked to peers, sought advice, and dug deeper into the problem. Slowly, ideas began to form. I returned with three potential solutions. He listened patiently, then asked the same question:
“What do you think is the best path?”
I chose one. He nodded and said, “Sounds like a plan. Let me know how it goes.”
And just like that, I realized what he had done.
Years later, I was in his shoes, an executive, now leading senior managers of my own. One day, one of them called in a panic, laying out a complex issue and clearly expecting me to give them the fix.
I listened, then asked, “Have you talked to your peers?”
They said no. Their previous boss insisted on being the sole gatekeeper of solutions, fearing repercussions from above.
So, I tried something different. I said, “Do you remember the show Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?”
They laughed. Of course, they did.
“Well,” I told them, “on that show, you only get three lifelines. But here? You’ve got unlimited lifelines, your peers, mentors, teams. Use them. I don’t need to solve this for you. You’ve got this.”
The line went quiet for a second. Then came the response: “Really?”
“Absolutely.”
At our next one-on-one, I asked how the issue turned out. They smiled and said, “Oh, that? Yeah, I dealt with it. We’re good.”
Leadership isn’t about having all the answers, it’s about creating an environment where others can find them. The most effective leaders grow thinkers, not followers.
Observations:
- You can’t outpace complexity alone: build teams and systems that share the load.
- Empowerment scales better than control: leaders should enable others to lead.
- Vulnerability builds trust: humility invites stronger collaboration.
- The answers are often already in the room: your job is to surface them, not supply them.
Robbie